Short extracts from five more of the songs in my forthcoming book, Blasphemy! The Musical. Today...

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They'll Say Anything
I'd Do Anything (Oliver!)

They'll say anything
To please God, anything
And all things Biblical are true
They're taught that
Satan's everywhere
There's no good anywhere
We're evil sinners through and through

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God Is Never There
Walking In The Air (The Snowman)

Your God is never there
You pray but you don't wonder why
He cannot say hello
There's no-one to reply
...
Now your mind cannot grow
Prayers make it sleep
Understanding has its price
Faith is cheap

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Their Religion Is Insane
There Is Nothin' Like A Dame (South Pacific)

Their religion is insane
Foolish and absurd
File the Bible under 'lame'
Christianity's quite insane

It's so easy to explain
In a single word
Read the Bible and proclaim
That its followers are insane

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So You Wanna Be A Baptist
So You Wanna Be A Boxer (Bugsy Malone)

So you wanna be a Baptist
We're a big success
Any laws God didn't issue
We will suppress

If you drink or you bet
Turn around you're a threat
We don't need you
Smokin' weed, sellin' dope
If you don't think the Pope's
Gonna lead you
Into Satan's great pit
Bible says you ain't fit

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Praying For The World To End
Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)

The rumours of war
Will be so instrumental
When praying for the world to end
The past had far more
But that's coincidental
Now they take delight
The end's in sight, the timing's right

Famines grow and we all know
This is far from a new global trend
But they think the food link
Ties up with God's time sync
Praying for the world to end

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More tomorrow!

As announced earlier this month, I am currently writing 100 songs for a book provisionally called Blasphemy! The Musical, in which I'm creating new lyrics for well-known show tunes. So that you know exactly what you'll be getting in the final book, I've decided to release short extracts from each song, plus the original titles of the movies/shows in which they can be found. I'll be posting 5 songs per day until I catch up with the current list. As I write I've already written 35 songs, so this will take a while! Here goes...

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Three Little Parts of God
Three Little Maids From School (The Mikado)

Three little parts of God are we
Joined into one - the Trinity
Quite a conundrum you'll agree
Three little parts of God
...
Three little parts, and each all-knowing
Part of a lie which keeps on growing
Logic and reason, neither's showing
Three little parts of God

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I Am The Very Model of a Knowledgeable Atheist
I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General (The Pirates of Penzance)

I am the very model of a knowledgeable atheist
I've information Catholic and Mormon and Creationist
I know the Ten Commandments and the books of all the Testaments
It's certainly incredible for some they still have relevance
...
The Bible I have studied more than most in Christianity
I'm excellent at pointing out the flaws in its theology
In short, in matters Methodist and Baptist and Evangelist
I am the very model of a knowledgeable atheist

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A School Full of Science
A Spoonful of Sugar (Mary Poppins)

ID just doesn't pass the test
Their so-called scientists detest
All critical attempts to probe and dig
They try an ever-changing route
To counter each thing we refute
We'll prove them wrong - it won't take very long

For a school full of science breaks Intelligent Design
There isn't any sign
Of evidence divine
Just a school full of science breaks Intelligent Design
Leaving it in disarray

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Freak Cult Sci-Fi
Sweet Transvestite (Rocky Horror Picture Show)

Where were you in
'52 when
L Ron had the plan?
He wrote some part of it down
Really went to town
That's where this story all began

It's so far out
But a tempting hook
Just take the bait to discover
When your audit began
You paid cash in hand
And your credit may never recover

Believe in freak cult sci-fi
It's all fictional
Scientology

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Al-Qaeda! (al-ky-ee-da)
Oklahoma! (Oklahoma!)

Al-Qaeda!
Training mad jihadis for the planes
Quote an ancient book and make it look
Like the Muslim world has gone insane
Al-Qaeda!
Only crazed fanatics should apply
Taking bombs worldwide for suicide
So that crowds of infidels will die

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Remember that these are just extracts - the final book will contain the full sing-along versions of 100 beautifully blasphemous songs! More extracts tomorrow!

Big news! And the reason I've been so quiet for a while!

My forthcoming book will contain 100 songs from the great musicals and shows!

Okay, before you come out with 'WTF?!' here's the why and the what...

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Blasphemy! The Musical

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...with alternative lyrics, naturally! Songs such as:

• Godless and Free
• Their Religion Is Insane
• A School Full of Science
• Religion Is Just A Con-Trick
• Christ Is Too Fat To Weigh
• So You Wanna Be A Baptist
• Don't Call Me Christ, I'm Christina
• Indoctrinate, Indoctrinate, Indoctrinate!
• There's Mo Hammad, He's So Hammered
• Their Chanting's Really Getting On My Nerves
• I Am The Very Model of a Knowledgeable Atheist

...and many more 'alternative' show tunes!

For up-to-date progress, I currently have a slider showing on my YouTube channel, where you will also find a playlist containing the original songs. Match my new titles with the originals!

Release date? Tentatively I would say 'early November', which ain't all that far away.

More news will follow, so stay tuned!